Better In Time
by dreamgoddess'92
Summary: A case affects Emily strongly and she battles with a crisis in faith due to her job. Can Hotch be there for Emily like she's been for him since Foyet? Can he manage to help her see that things will get better eventually?
1. Falling Apart

Howdy ya'll.

I have like two other stories I'm working on and after hearing this song I just sat down with my laptop and started writing; completely disregarding the other two stories I had planned on putting on here today! That's so like me. So tomorrow I'll try to get at least my CM story up and Saturday (hopefully) my NCIS one.

This will be multi-chapter btw.

I do not own Criminal Minds unfortunately nor "The Moment I Said It" by Imogen Heap.

Please enjoy&review!

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_The moment I said it,_

_the moment I opened my mouth_

_Lead in your eyelids_

_bulldozed the life out of me_

_I know what you're thinking_

_But darling you're not thinking straight_

_Sadly things just happen we can't explain_

Emily had never felt so helpless in her entire life.

Doing this job, the team had gotten use to seeing some awful sights and putting some serious creeps behind bars, or in the ground in needed be. This case though, this case left the entire team with a feeling of defeat and failure. It was one of those cases that seemed like the team would never recover from. They felt as if this case had taken something from them all, something they'd never get back: Their hope in humanity.

It was hard to decide whom the case had affected more. The entire team had memorized the case files and had wretched images imprinted in their brains for many years to come. They all had raced against the ticking clock to save that little girl. They all lost her.

Emily had been the one to find her in the storage closet of their unsub's apartment. Frantically, Emily had called for Hotch to call an ambulance. She pulled the fragile body from the closet and tried to breathe life into it. She wouldn't stop calling the little girl's name.

"Aly…Aly I need you to open your eyes. Aly…" Emily Prentiss cried as she pumped on her little chest after breathing into her mouth. Aly didn't open her eyes. Hotch watched, heartbroken as Emily's cries got louder and less distinguishable. Emily had tears streaming down her face as Morgan ran up to see where she and Hotch had vanished. He put his gun down and felt the air leave his lungs at the sight of the little girl Emily's body was poised over. They had been too late.

Hotch had to pull Emily away from Alyson Porter's body as the paramedics tried in vain to do what Emily had failed to do. She was trying to contain her shakes as Hotch ran his hands up and down her arms in a comforting gesture. It wasn't much but it was enough to keep Emily from falling apart at the seams. His heart went out to the woman half in his arms and half on the floor. She had been pushing herself so hard to find Alyson; he knew for a fact she was functioning on less than five hours of sleep. The entire team for that matter was running on fumes of caffeine.

The ride back to the police station was quiet. Emily seemed like a hollow shell where as Morgan didn't have any words to say. Hotch was driving lost in his own world. Hotch's cell phone went off startling them.

"Hotchner." Hotch said praying it was Rossi with some good news. He listened and felt relief, though it was minimal. "We'll be right there." Hotch replied to Rossi and hung up the phone. Emily was looking at him from the back seat and Morgan sat attentive in the passenger's. Hotch met Emily's eyes in his rearview mirror as he spoke. "They got him."

_It's not even light out,_

_But you've somewhere to be - no hesitation_

_No I've never seen you like this_

_And I don't like it, I don't like it, I don't like it at all_

He watched as she closed her eyes in a brief moment of relief but he could still see the dark shadows in her eyes when she opened them once more. It was a bitter victory.

Emily couldn't bring herself to look at the unsub's cold body on the pavement. He had gotten what he deserved as far as she was concerned. The thought of seeing the Porters again though, made Emily wish she had never come along for this case. She had been sick earlier and Morgan suggested that she stay home until she was feeling 100%, but being Miss Stubborn, Emily had assured him she'd be fine and that she could handle this case. Emily had never been more wrong. She doubted she'd been able to look at certain things the same way ever again.

Emily had once asked Morgan what made them so different from serial killers: Men who became hunters of humans. She had her own crisis of faith in her job that case and she didn't think she'd have it again. Though when they had that case in LA with the famous comic book artist Jonny McHale, Emily again couldn't believe what people were capable of doing over such a short period of time. Rossi had been right, life is a hell of a thing to happen to a person.

Emily was getting tired of Hotch watching her like he was expecting her to explode or something. Then again, she supposed that was how he felt as the entire team watched Hotch since Foyet's attack. She never realized how annoying it was until then. She couldn't blame him though. Emily was sure she looked a sight. She was sure she'd probably never be the same as well. Her mother had voiced her dislike of Emily's career choice before and for once Emily would have to agree with her. This job left behind a lot of broken people.

The team headed back to the precinct fairly quickly much to Emily's relief. Though what awaited Emily made her gut drop and her stomach knot itself up. The Porters were waiting with JJ, both of them red eyed. JJ had told them about Aly. Sally Porter spotted Emily and was on her in a split second.

"You promised me you'd bring my baby back!" Sally cried jabbing an accusatory finger at Emily. Hotch tried his best to deter the hysterical woman and spare Emily any more grief, but Sally was relentless. Emily looked trapped like a scared defenseless animal looking down the mouth of a vicious animal bent on tearing her to pieces. She was frozen as Frank Porter came to collect his wife. He didn't look angry with her, just defeated. Emily wasn't sure which look was worse.

"Sally, she tried her best. There was nothing she could do…" Frank tried to console his wife, but she wasn't having it. "She could've tried harder Frank!" Sally screamed, her voice raw with tears. Emily felt her own eyes tear up as visions of Aly flashed before her eyes. If Emily could've done more, she certainly couldn't see it.

_Just put back the car keys_

_or somebody's going to get hurt_

_Who are you calling at this hour_

_Sit down, come round , I need you now_

"I'm sorry." Emily said her voice catching in her throat. Sally Porter looked as if she had been caught off balance but quickly recovered as her hand swung up and struck Emily hard. Frank looked at his wife horrified as Morgan fell upon the woman, escorting them both away. He said nothing as JJ took the couple away from him; he was not going to stand by and let Emily take the blame for this one.

There was nothing more she could've done, nothing any of them could've done. He turned to look at Emily whose hand was cupping her cheek in shock. Hotch was turned towards her, speaking to her but Morgan could tell nothing was getting through to her. Morgan mentally cursed.

- - - - -

Emily barely registered anything else the team said to her as they packed up their gear and left the precinct. Her cheek was red and radiated a dull heat. She seemed in as if in a daze as she responded very little to anything her team asked her. If it hadn't been for Reid, Emily would've fallen head first into the plane because she had tripped. She thanked the genius quietly and took her seat in the back where she hoped not to be bothered. She ignored the stares the team was sending her way.

During the entire plane ride Emily was quiet, not talking to anyone despite the team's attempts to get her to say something. Eventually Hotch just shook his head at the others and they quietly left her be. This was something Emily had to deal with by herself; at least for the time being. Hotch wasn't surprised when Emily quickly grabbed her stuff when the plane landed and rushed to get away from everyone. He met Morgan's concerned eyes and he could feel the same stares coming from the rest of the team.

'_I'll deal with it_.' Hotch's nod seemed to say and he saw the team visibly relax. They knew if anyone could connect to Emily at this point it was Hotch. He just hoped she'd be willing to let him in.

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Yay, chapter one is done! *cheers* I'm probably gonna have chapter two up tonight-and I think that's all I'll do. Maybe if I make a third chapter I'll use a different song since by the third chapter I hope to have Emily more-or-less better because of Hotch.

Tell me what you think.

Peace out.


	2. Fix You

Hey guys/gals.

I decided to bite the bullet and just post the 2nd chapter tonight before I call it a night. There probably will be a chapter 3. I just think I can do a little more with Hotch & Emily before I end this story. So I'll see what I can do.

Please enjoy and review!

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Emily was silent during the car ride back to Quantico: She was starring out the window in the passenger seat. Hotch would steal glances at her, debating on how to go about this. Emily was such an enigma to Hotch; she never did anything he expected. He knew though that he had to figure out something. Quickly.

Once back in the office the team started to go to their respective desks until Morgan told them all to go home. They all watched their current leader as he directed his statement to Emily, who barely nodded in acceptance. Breathing a little easier Morgan walked away to his office to gather his own stuff.

Garcia stopped beside Emily's desk and gave her friend and pat on the shoulder and told her to call if she needed anything. Emily was actually grateful for Garcia's offer and smiled faintly at her. The others made sure to let Emily know she had them as well. JJ squeezed Emily's hand as she left and Rossi pulled her in a one-armed hug. Reid, who was normally such an awkward kind of guy, hugged Emily tightly and told her to take it easy.

Emily, shocked at Reid's open approach managed to return his hug and told him she would. They both knew it was a lie, but it managed to pacify them both for the time being. Emily smiled at Morgan who ruffled her hair affectionately and didn't stick around to see if Hotch would say anything to her. She doubted he'd go home early anyway. Than man was married to his job, something Emily had an even harder time wrapping her head around after going though mill with this case.

_We'll work it all out together_

_We're getting nowhere tonight_

_Now sleep, I promise, it'll all seem better_

_somehow in time_

Hotch watched Emily leave and decided to give her a head start on dealing with the days events however she wanted to until he managed to get to her. Sometime you needed to self-destruct a little before someone could help pull you back together. Hotch managed to distract himself for almost two hours before he decided it would be a good idea to head over to Emily's and see how she was.

He could feel the overwhelming concern crush him as he walked quickly out the office, now in a hurry to get to Emily. He couldn't imagine feeling like this almost every single day. Hotch didn't know how Emily could afford to feel this onset of emotions on a daily basis. He knew she hovered over him, like he was going to hover over her for the next few days. Honestly though he hadn't given it much thought until he watched her blank stare out the plane window.

Night seemed to fall over the city quickly as Hotch drove to Emily's.

Hotch didn't even remember getting out of his car and walking up the stairs to her apartment. He heard a thump then a crash on the other side of Emily's door and he knocked again; this time harder. He heard footsteps approach the door and stop. He knew she was debating on whether or not to let him in. "Emily, let me in." Hotch said in a commanding tone of voice but at the same time using her first name to establish a sense of connection. He waited a few more minutes but eventually Emily unlocked her door and let it swing open. Hotch took in her appearance and inwardly cringed. To say she looked like hell would be an understatement.

Her make up was smeared and her hair was put in a very messy bun, which seemed to fall apart with each breath Emily took. Her clothes we wrinkled and she had a bottle of wine in one hand, a bottle of scotch in the other. He had in inkling that she'd turn to alcohol tonight. Her eyes looked like black holes in which no light would ever shine again. This side of Emily deeply concerned Hotch and admittedly, frightened him. He had never seen someone so full of life look so dead. He sure had his work cut out for him tonight.

_It's not even light out_

_Suddenly, you've somewhere to be- no hesitation_

_I've never seen you like this_

_You're scaring me, you're scaring me,_

_You're scaring me to death_

"Come in Hotch." Emily said, her words only slightly slurred. She wasn't going to question him about why he was there: She knew all to well why. He was going to try and salvage her. She wished him the best of luck as he thanked her and shut her door behind him. Emily offered him a glass of scotch and surprisingly enough, he agreed. Sure they had shared a drink after a case together, but they had been at the office and Rossi had been present as well. This was a little unexpected. Emily wondered at what game Hotch was playing at.

Hotch knew he was going to have to be delicate with her, and he had no plans of leaving until she was okay. He followed Emily to the kitchen and stood against the counter where he watched Emily pour him a glass. She poured herself some more wine and handed him his glass. They stood in silence, both staring into their glasses; contemplating the next move.

"So, you going to fix me Hotch?" Emily asked after a few minutes of silence. He looked up at her and saw her grim smile on her lips and her dead eyes staring back at him. Hotch decided to be blunt. "Yes. That's the plan." Hotch replied taking a sip of his beverage, savoring the new warmth running though his veins. Emily chuckled dryly. She should've known he wouldn't beat around the bush with her. She had been pretty obvious and blatant with him after Foyet.

"Okay, give it you best shot boss." Emily said mockingly. It wasn't like she got a chance to be so open with him normally. Honestly, though she was suffering she was glad he was there. He understood the pain she was feeling. The disappointment, the guilt, the doubt. Emily believed in him more than she did her job at this point. He was stable and erratic at the same time. Chaos and order wrapped up in one nice package for Emily to enjoy.

Hotch saw the challenge in her eyes coupled with the freedom of not having to be Agent Prentiss with him. He understood that feeling perfectly. There were times Emily was able to bring out Aaron, and he needed that. It was his turn now, to help her.

Hotch looked down at his glass and when he looked back up into Emily's eyes he felt his heart clench at the look of utter defeat in her eyes. There was a tender vulnerability laced with fear in those dark eyes of hers and Hotch was sure she had seen that look in his eyes countless times. He refused to let her down.

_I'm losing you. _

_I'm losing you_

"Emily, all I can tell you at this point is that it will get better in time. This job doesn't offer apologies for every nightmare it gives us. It doesn't always leave us with a feeling of accomplishment. It sometimes creates more problems than solutions, we know this. Yet we still get up each morning and go into that office where we look at awful pictures and read dreadful case files. The only thing I can tell you Emily is that it's worth it in the end." Hotch said watching Emily carefully.

"You don't believe that Hotch. I doubt you've believed that for a very long time." Emily accused, her voice low and groggy. Hotch had to admit she had a point, but she was also very wrong.

"That's not true Emily. Sure, I lose sight of why I do this job when we leave a town after a bad case, but I always come back to the conclusion that this job is worth it. The team, you…you always make sure I remember that without even noticing it." Hotch replied taking a step towards Emily's shivering figure. Her apartment was quite cold now that Hotch noticed it.

Hotch couldn't watch Emily throw away all her ideals and her beliefs about their job. She was a strong woman who dedicated so much to her job. She was one of the most passionate people he had ever met and he admired her for that. She had the ability to make him believe in things when all he wanted to do was crawl up with a bottle of scotch and live in bed all day. He wouldn't let her sink into the hole of depression and doubt he almost didn't resurface from.

_Trust me on this one_

_I've got a bad feeling_

_Trust me on this one_

_You're going to throw it all away_

_With no hesitation_

Emily heard what he was saying and let his words sink into her skin. She had always tried her best to help Hotch. She wanted to be there for him as much as she could and he apparently wanted to do the same thing for her. Emily felt a little lighter as Hotch continued to take a few more steps towards her. Emily was still unsure of a lot of things though. She knew that Hotch knew she would be. The good thing about being a profiler is being able to know one another's inner workings. They just clicked like pieces in a puzzle that was still missing some pieces.

Once Hotch was a few inches away, Emily looked up and felt exhaustion hit her like a wrecking ball. She still had a mess of glass to clean up from when she had bumped into her living room table but all she wanted to do was rest. She had to admit though, that Hotch was a great fixer. She felt like he had sowed her up a little, knowing that he still had some more stitches to sow. Smiling at him for the first time in days, Emily leaned her head on Hotch's chest and let the dream world claim her.

Hotch steadied her and quickly held on to her. He grabbed her glass before she let go of it completely. Picking her up bridal style, Hotch moved upstairs and looked around for her bedroom. After a few minutes of looking he found it and gently laid her down.

Hotch turned to leave but Emily had a strong hold on his sleeve. Smiling to himself, Hotch decided it would ultimately be better if he stayed. Just tonight, just to make sure she would be okay. Hotch refused to acknowledge any other less professional reasons for his desire to stay. His real goal was to help Emily. His other wishes could wait for another day.

Hotch gently eased himself into her bed and smiled as Emily curled into his side. Grabbing a blanket, Hotch covered Emily and himself up, making sure they wouldn't get cold later. He hadn't turned on a light when he had entered the room so Hotch immediately felt the soft pull of sleep. Together they'd face the day tomorrow, but for now Hotch was perfectly content to sleep with her in his arms; safe from the demons that haunted them both.

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*laughter* So I got them in bed, just not in a perverted way! That was never how I intended to write this fic, but I did want them to fall asleep together because it's cute. I'm not sure what I'll do with chapter 3 but I'm sure I'll come up with something good.

Thank you all for reading and all your kind reviews. =)

Peace out.


	3. We're Alright

Hey everyone!

Sorry it took me so long to post this last chapter. School's been murder and I've had to focus most of my attention of surviving my senior year. *laugh* But thankfully, I was able to finish this story and I will be working on yet another one. This next one though, I'm pretty excited about because I found the perfect song for it. I'll probably have it up tomorrow, that's how excited I am.

(I do not own "Look After You" by The Fray either)

Please enjoy & review!

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_There now, steady love, so few come and don't go._

_Will you won't you, _

_be the one I'll always know?_

_When I'm losing my control, _

_the city spins around._

_You're the only one who knows, you slow it down_

Emily awoke with a killer headache and the lack of warmth next to her.

She gently opened her eyes and groaned as the sun managed to find its way in through a crack in her curtains. Emily noticed how she was still in her clothes from last night and how she wasn't under her covers. A blanket was stretched over her body, but Emily looked over and saw where it had previously covered another body.

'Hotch' Emily thought quickly as her mind caught her up on the night's events. Struggling to get out of bed to see if he was still there, Emily stumbled off the bed and feel with a thump on the floor. Cursing and rubbing her sore bum, Emily used the bed for support. She'd have to take something if she was going to survive this morning's hangover. Emily was dragging her feet down the hall to her bathroom and managed to get some ibuprofen out of her medicine cabinet.

Making her way slowly down her stairs, the faint aroma of bacon greeted Emily. Her stomach growled loudly making Emily chuckle slightly. Emily watched in awe as Hotch, who was still in his suit with his sleeves rolled up (minus his jacket), made his way around her little kitchen. It was an odd sight to see. Domestic. Emily tried to fight the rising pleasure at his current occupation but smiled as she heard him hum something to himself.

"Smells fantastic." Emily said not surprised at how Hotch didn't miss a beat. Emily swore nothing could make that man jump or flinch. Hotch turned around and smiled at her.

"She wakes," he joked and went back to preparing their breakfast. Emily laughed softly as she took a seat at her bar-like counter. Though her head still throbbed a little, Emily was completely content in her kitchen as she watched Hotch perform such a simple task. This was a side of him Emily could get used to seeing.

"I was hoping you would've slept longer. Your head must be killing you." Hotch said as he opened a cabinet and pulled out two plates. Emily nodded enthusiastically much to Hotch's amusement.

"I don't know what woke me up, my headache or the lack of warmth in my bed." Emily said as she started to get up to help him. Hotch shook his head at her and motioned for her to sit back down. Not really in the mood to argue, Emily did as she was told and plopped back down in her seat ignoring the almost smirk on Hotch's lips.

"As much as I would've loved staying in bed, someone had to make breakfast." Hotch said with his back turned to her as he pulled two mugs from a different cabinet. Emily's eyes widened at his confession and felt her face get a little warmer. Emily herself sure didn't mind cuddling up to him last night; was it possible that he enjoyed it as well? Emily would have to figure that mystery out later because Hotch was making her plate of food and she was famished.

Emily didn't wait for Hotch to sit down before she dug in. Emily had never tasted a breakfast so delicious. The bacon was just right and the eggs felt like clouds in her mouth. The toast was a little done, but Emily loved burnt toast. Hotch also knew how she took her coffee and she greedily drank it down once he handed her a cup. Hotch tried not to laugh at Emily's eating habit, which made her look like a woman who hadn't been feed in days instead of hours. Together they ate in a comfortable silence.

Emily had to admit she was feeling better by the time she had finished her food. While eating, she had also been digesting everything Hotch had said to her the previous night. It had been hard to get over the pain of their case, but Emily knew with time it would get better. Emily looked up at the man who had managed to pull her back from the edges of despair and saw he was studying her carefully. Emily hid her smile behind her coffee cup as she took another drink.

"Hotch, I want to thank you for last night." Emily said looking down at her hands almost in shame. Emily was supposed to be one of the strong members of the team who never let cases get to her too much. She wasn't one to drown herself in wine and scotch. Sure a drink here and there, but not like last night. She was having her own little pity party, and Hotch had crashed it: Much to Emily's relief that is.

Hotch debated about his next course of action, but decided to go with the more personal side like he did last night. Emily didn't need her boss, she needed the man who realized he would do just about anything for her.

Hotch reached over and grabbed her hand that she was staring at. Emily looked up in surprise and met his dark eyes.

"You have nothing to thank me for. You would've eventually snapped yourself out of it. You're strong like that." Hotch said gently running his thumb up and down her soft hand.

Emily wasn't so sure about that. "I don't think so Hotch. It meant a lot to me, you coming over last night. I don't think I could've done it without you." Emily said assuredly and truthfully. Emily knew that if it hadn't been for him, that she would've carried that burden for months to come. She would always be grateful to him.

_Oh, oh,_

_Be my baby._

_I'll look after you._

Hotch let himself absorb her words and smile as she squeezed his hand. They had come a long way since she had joined the team. Hotch hadn't seen this one coming. Somewhere along the line Emily Prentiss had become someone very special to him. Someone close to his ice-encased heart. She had melted some of it away and made a niche for herself. Tricky woman.

Emily noticed how the normal tension in Hotch leaked out and his eyes softened as he gazed at their hands. She could feel the warmth that she had been missing that morning radiating from his hand. Emily knew without a doubt that she couldn't have moved on from the trauma of their latest case without him. Emily was starting to believe that she would always need Hotch in her life. She enjoyed this side of them. Sitting in her warm kitchen just offering comfort to each other. Emily didn't want this moment to end, and by the way Hotch was looking at her neither did he.

His barriers were done and hers were practically non-existent at this point. He made her feel so safe and she made him want to show her all he had to offer. At some point they began to rely on each other for that feeling of calm during a storm. They were like anchors in an unpredictable sea.

Emily smiled as Hotch gently let go of her hands and began cleaning up the kitchen; another domestic act Emily wouldn't have ever pictured Hotch doing. The air was warm with the affection the both of them were radiating. Emily grabbed her cup and moved to the sink to help him. Hotch started to protest but Emily simply shook her head and laughed at his half-hearted glare. The only sound was of running water and the occasional clank of dishes. She washed and he dried. It was a cozy sight.

Emily felt a jolt of electricity as Hotch's arm brushed against hers and Emily noticed how Hotch almost went out of his way to make it happen again. Emily felt like a little schoolgirl as she would 'accidentally' make her hips brush against his side and she had to bite back a giggle as Hotch would freeze for a moment then almost bury his face in her dark hair. He would get her back though as his hands would lightly brush her side and go higher and higher with each touch.

The kitchen seemed a little bit warmer than Emily had remembered as Hotch managed to lean in closer to her body, pressing his whole side against hers. He was teasing her, and she was falling for it hook, line, and sinker.

Once the dished were done they stood silently next to each other, reveling the their close proximity. Emily finally turned to face Hotch and seeing her chance, braced herself, she pulled on his shirt to bring his lips to hers. Hotch had already been leaning in when Emily pulled him towards her, and he smiled against her slightly chapped lips. He brought his hands up and gently cupped her cheeks.

It was a short and tender kiss; like most first kisses should be. Emily opened her eyes and couldn't stop the small giggle of euphoria that escaped her lips. Smiling, Hotch kissed her once more and they knew they would be alright.

_It's always have and never hold._

_You've begun to feel like home._

_What's mine is yours to leave or take._

_What's mine is yours to make your own._

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Ah, so cute! I just love the domestic quality of this chapter. *laugh*

Thank you all for being patient with me, I'll try better at getting my multi-chapter stories done quicker next time. I also hope to have my first NCIS fic up by Wednesday! w00t! Oh, and I'm toying with an idea for a Bones one as well. Hope you enjoyed this story. =)

Peace out.


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